Revision sucks. There is no use sugar-coating it but with exams looming you know it has to be done. So you decide to get on it, you make a revision guide – complete with colour coding and smiley face stickers, you buy a brand spanking new (overpriced) revision folder, you clear the mountain of clothes from your bedroom desk and you begin.
Your good intentions last a whole 2 minutes. Suddenly instead of studying Shakespeare you’re watching videos of cats playing the piano and checking the facebook profile of people you haven’t spoken to in 15 years. #Procrastination.
Here is a list of 21 (the amount is actually infinite) activities more appealing than revision followed by a ‘to do’ or ‘not to do’:
- Devour an entire packet of Oreos – not to do. You will feel sick.
- Make a smoothie – to do. A healthy alternative and a worthwhile study break.
- Google your name – not to do.
- Google the name of everyone you know – definitely not to do.
- Take a walk – to do. This may seem like a massive effort but a ten minute walk will give you fresh air and a chance to clear the mess which is the inside of your brain. There are lots of pretty things outside like daffodils and baby rabbits so get out there and curse every single one for not knowing the perpetual boredom that is revision.
- Create your avatar on Bitstrips – not to do. You will spend half an hour getting the eye colour exactly your shade and the nose exactly your size or maybe a little smaller.
- Clean the oven – not to do. Why do we get a Snow White urge to clean and tidy when we have revision to do? Your bedroom maybe but the oven is a job for after exams.
- Watch a video of cats wearing hats on Youtube – not to do. It may be cute but it’s a slippery slope, next you’ll be hitting the hard stuff like dogs wearing sunglasses.
- Bake a cake – to do. You need a break and some sugar.
- Eat the entire cake – not to do. Again you will feel sick.
- Meditate – to do. Pre exam stress is the perfect time to turn to Buddhism and discover you are no longer flexible enough to do the lotus position.
- Dance around like a loon – to do. This may seem silly but it’s good for you! Just make sure the curtains are closed.
- Do a sellotape selfie – to do. Why not? Try not to cut off all circulation to the brain.
- Watch the entire box set of Breaking Bad – not to do. Even if you decide on just one episode it will soon turn into ten.
- Watch a self-contained, half hour episode – to do. A programme like Friends or South Park is perfect as it will give you comic relief without frustrating you with a cliff hanger.
- Learn every Capital City in the world – not to do. Although very handy for a pub quiz there is only so much worthless knowledge your brain can take.
- Play ten pin bowling with empty energy drink cans – not to do. Perhaps it’s time to reassess your caffeine intake as well.
- Put the 30 odd loo roll middles into the bin – to do. Although now you cant’s make a loo roll pyramid.
- Learn to juggle – not to do. Unless your degree is in circus skills.
- Call your parents – to do. A quick rant about how revision will surely kill you never hurt anyone.
- Make a timetable to organise your procrastination breaks – to do. To be honest most activities are OK as long as you have time for them.
Happy procrastination and remember, you do need to revise!